Slurredspeech

Word of the day: Cum

by casey on Apr.05, 2006, under Drunken Rambling

Cum

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Sketches for a Buck

by casey on Mar.27, 2006, under Random Thoughts

I heard about Sketch It from Ben and thought I would give it a try. A local artist, Kelly Newcomer, did a sweet sketch of Bipin. The results are perfect…maybe better than perfect. I’m going to have it framed and hang it over Bip’s bed. Everyone should have a sketch done, and for only a dollar, how can you afford not to?

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Google Pages Beta

by casey on Mar.22, 2006, under Drunken Rambling

Got my Google pages page set up. Not very many features and definitely not a viable blogging solution yet.

http://caseyhelbling.googlepages.com

In other news finance.google.com is up and running. They are mashing up news data points with the stock charts. This is something I have thought would be nice for awhile now. The other sweet feature is the deep links right into other third party data like finance.yahoo.com and Wikipedia.

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Real Life Simpsons Intro

by casey on Mar.21, 2006, under Drunken Rambling

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‘Impeach Bush’ chorus grows

by casey on Mar.19, 2006, under Political Maundering

John Kerry, the 2004 presidential nominee, was overheard in an Irish bar on Capitol Hill talking about how satisfying it would be to impeach Bush if Congress went Democrat. He was just having a laugh, his spokeswoman rushed to explain: “Impeachment jokes in Washington are as old as Donald Rumsfeld.”

But then she turned serious: “How are the same Republicans, who tried to impeach a president over whether he misled a nation about an affair, going to pretend it does not matter if the administration intentionally misled the country into war?”

Times Online

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Google Phone Book

by casey on Mar.17, 2006, under Drunken Rambling

Man… I’m falling behind. When the hell did they do this? They got all the information wrong… but still…

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Hostage and Torture Consultants

by casey on Mar.11, 2006, under Political Maundering

In very sad news, American hostage, Tom Fox, was found dead today with apparent torture wounds.

In other sad news, the US continues to hold its own hostages in order to demonstrate to the world what it takes to be strong democracy.

About 490 foreign terrorism suspects are being held at Guantanamo, many for four years and only 10 charged with a crime.

Maybe in an attempt to be more like the US, the new Iraqi government should hire Tom Fox’s captors to teach them how to take hostages, torture people and all in all just be more like the US.

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UPS Thinks I’m an ASSCLOWN

by casey on Mar.10, 2006, under People are Idiots

My new notebook arrived yesterday after a small crisis. Apparently the UPS driver was in such a hurry he didn’t bother knocking or ringing the doorbell and just left a “tried to deliver slip” on my front door. The annoying part is that Bipin and I were home all afternoon in anticipation of this delivery. I purposely wasn’t listening to music or doing anything loud just to make sure I wouldn’t miss his arrival. Thanks to Erin who noticed at 4:07 on UPS’s website that they tried and failed to deliver the package. I immediately (at 4:08) called UPS and they said the driver tried to deliver the package at 3:32 but no one was home. I said that’s funny because I’ve been sitting here, waiting, all day long. Needless to say I was furious. The customer service representative said he would call the local office and try to have the driver make another stop. Well the driver showed up a little before 5, I signed the broke-ass electronic clipboard, and got my new computer.

This morning when I got into the office I started thinking about how pissed I was yesterday. I decided to look at UPS’s delivery status website just to see what it said. I was amazed to find that

ASSCLOWN received a package yesterday. I know I had problems signing the electronic clipboard thingy… but… I hardly believe my scribble looked anything like “ASSCLOWN.” See for yourself. My tracking number is 1Z 90X 310 39 4516 857 6 I’m just trying to decide if this falls in the realms of a slander lawsuit.

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The Baby!

by casey on Mar.06, 2006, under Random Thoughts

This morning Erin and I had the ultrasound for the baby. It was so amazing to see the little guy/girl?! wiggling around inside Erin. We are 19 weeks along and it is really starting to sink in that in less than 5 months I am going to be a daddy. Wow! Have fun with the photos… The first three are aggregate photos with about 4-6 individuals on one page. All the rest are broken out individuals. “baby_individual_2006.03.06_06.jpg” seen below is a cool image where you can see him/her yawning… or … insert random alien screaming joke here.

Small photos
Large photos

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Amazing Robo Mule

by casey on Mar.05, 2006, under Drunken Rambling

An amazing video of a robot mule. These things just keep getting better and better. Watch the robot regain its footing after the operator tries to kick it over

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Move to Iraq

by casey on Mar.03, 2006, under Political Maundering

If people want a theocratic state move to fucking Iraq. I’m just sayin… ’cause If you haven’t noticed we are doing a hell of a job setting one up for yah.

Missouri bill proposes Christianity as official religion

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72% of troops want home by end of 2006

by casey on Mar.01, 2006, under Political Maundering

While most of this survey is “good news,” there are a couple very troubling statistics about why the troops believe we are fighting in Iraq.

The wide-ranging poll also shows that 58% of those serving in country say the U.S. mission in Iraq is clear in their minds, while 42% said it is either somewhat or very unclear to them, that they have no understanding of it at all, or are unsure. While 85% said the U.S. mission is mainly “to retaliate for Saddam’s role in the 9-11 attacks,” 77% said they also believe the main or a major reason for the war was “to stop Saddam from protecting al Qaeda in Iraq.”

http://www.zogby.com/news

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Good news, Sager isn’t crap

by casey on Feb.28, 2006, under Drunken Rambling

Thank god… I went out on a limb on this new notebook but it sounds like I should be happy with it. Notebookreview.com has a review on the 27th about the Sager 9750 and gave it outstanding marks…. now if the damn thing would hurry up and get here so I can see for myself.

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New bill would deny Republicans right to adopt in Ohio

by casey on Feb.27, 2006, under Political Maundering

The bill cites “credible research” that proves children raised in GOP families tend to exhibit “emotional problems, social stigmas, inflated egos, and an alarming lack of tolerance for others they deem different than themselves and an air of overconfidence to mask their insecurities.”

Andrew Sullivan remarks:

“It’s absurd, of course. But no more absurd than the empirically baseless claims that kids brought up by gay parents are somehow at a disadvantage.”

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In the Bag: Tricked Out Notebook

by casey on Feb.24, 2006, under Drunken Rambling

My tired, old Dell Inspiron 2650 needed an upgrade. It was slow, hot and didn’t have a subwoofer. Since it only had 512 MB of RAM it was only really good for surfing and checking email. Bringing up Jboss and Eclipse at the same time was almost as painful as developing on Visual Age for Java in the early days. This time I decided to go all out and get something that I could actually use for development. Here are the specs of my recent purchase:

17″ WUXGA+ (1920 x 1200) Active Matrix , Glare-Type Display
AMD Athlon 64 X2 4400+ (2.2Ghz; L2 Cache: 1MB x 2) Toledo
Artic Silver 5 (AS5) Thermal CPU Paste Compound
256MB GDDR3 nVIDIA GeForce Go 7800 GTX PCI-Express 16x
2048 MB DDR SDRAM (400 MHz, PC-3200, Dual Channel) (2 x 1024 MB)
80 GB Hard Drive (7200 RPM) SATA
HDD RAID Settings – Off
8X DVD±R/RW / 4X+Dual Layer / 5X DVD-RAM / CD-RW Multi Drive (Pioneer DVR-k16)
External USB Floppy Drive
Built in 56k V.90 Modem
Built in 10/100/1000 Fast Ethernet / LAN Network Card
Wireless (Wi-Fi) Lan Card 802.11g (54 Mbps)
Add Internal Bluetooth Card (Combo card with Wi-Fi)
Smart Lithium Ion Battery (12 Cells)
Integrated 7-in-1 Card Reader
Integrated Video Camera / Internal Subwoofer Module
Auto-switching AC Adapter (220W; 100-250V)

ahhh snap…

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Patent on AJAX Granted?

by casey on Feb.24, 2006, under People are Idiots

Apparently the USPTO believes that some “no name webshop”1 has met all the requirements by demonstrating that their invention is non-obvious and unique, and granted a very broad patent over “Rich Media Applications on the Internet.” Kee-frickin-rist! What is next a patent on bathroom towels?

(Source InformationWeek)

(Source Jeffrey Zeldman – zeldman.com)

(Other obscure patents)

1 This is my protest to all the undeserved advertising this company is getting.

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Lombardi Cartoons Causing Unrest

by casey on Feb.22, 2006, under Drunken Rambling

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Collection of Random Green and Keep It Local Stuff

by casey on Feb.20, 2006, under Drunken Rambling

Here is a small list of some interesting “keep it in the community” type sites and services.

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Research Project: An Analysis of JBoss Architecture

by casey on Feb.16, 2006, under Software Digression

I found this paper “Research Project: An Analysis of JBoss Architecture” while trying to figure out the correct way to share a Connection between a CMP and BMP bean in Jboss 4.0.3. I thought I would post it since it is very well done, even though it didn’t solve my problem. I think we are getting the deadlocks and transaction timeouts because we access our Datasource in our BMPs via the InitialContext and a JNDI lookup. I have yet to verify that is actually the problem, but will report back if I find an answer.

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USARSP

by casey on Feb.15, 2006, under Drunken Rambling

The word on the street is that Scott is undefeated in Rock Paper Scissors. I think he should sign up for the World Championships. Otherwise there are weekly Roshambo tourneys at The Nomad Bar on cedar.

Before you go, read up on the latest RPS strategies. And don’t forget to check out the RPS Hotties!

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He Never Met Him?

by casey on Feb.09, 2006, under Political Maundering

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Yahoo Research

by casey on Feb.08, 2006, under Software Digression

Yahoo is doing some interesting things which are sometimes overlooked with all the GOOG hype.

Buzz Game – A Tech Fantasy Prediction Game
Mindset: Intent Driven Search
research.yahoo.com

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Amazon Mechanical Turk

by casey on Feb.07, 2006, under Software Digression

Complete “Human Intelligence Tasks” for money. Amazon’s Mechanical Turks

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Domestic Terrorism

by casey on Feb.03, 2006, under People are Idiots

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Planetdan.net

by casey on Feb.02, 2006, under Random Thoughts

This dude is pretty funny and has a great newspaper clipping that you have to read.

planetdan

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Daily Links

by casey on Feb.01, 2006, under Random Thoughts

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Celebrity Blogs

by casey on Dec.29, 2005, under Random Thoughts

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Freecycle

by casey on Dec.29, 2005, under Uncategorized

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New photos and movies added to the SlurredSpeech media empire

by casey on Dec.28, 2005, under Drunken Rambling

For your viewing pleasure, I just added some hand-selected photos to my flickr site http://www.flickr.com/photos/caseyhelbling.

If that doesn’t do it for you, the entire photo album is always available here http://caseyhelbling.dyndns.org/pics_new/2005/

And if photos aren’t your thing, but movies are, introducing www.youtube.com… Here is a short movie clip from over the weekend back in North Dakota. Bipin and Max battling it to the bloody death.
(continue reading…)

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A Slurredspeech Dictionary Entry

by casey on Dec.15, 2005, under Drunken Rambling

Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD):
     (n) A condition in children where the primary symptom is acting out do to a lack of attention from the parents.

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Murtha Speech and Quotes

by casey on Dec.02, 2005, under Political Maundering

Man … parts of this is really moving… use real player to view it.
rtsp://cspanrm.fplive.net/cspan/project/iraq/iraq111705_murtha.rm?mode=compact

Murtha quotes:

“Get that wounded marine a purple heart or I will give him one of mine…”
“80% of Iraqis want us out of there…”
“We are uniting the enemy against us…”
“There is more terrorism (in Iraq) now than there ever was…”
“I like guys that have never been there criticize us who have been there… I like guys who have five deferments criticize us who have been there… this is a flawed policy.”
“This one young commanding officer from Youngstown, three days before he was supposed to go home, he walked up to this IED and it blew up…”
“We have an obligation to speak for them… what do you think the soldiers are going to say… they are proud of their service… we have an obligation to speak for them… “

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CPR Technique To Be Change

by casey on Nov.28, 2005, under Drunken Rambling

Canada’s Heart and Stroke Foundation is looking to change the four decade old procedure from doing 15 chest compressions for every two breaths, to 30 chest compressions for every two breaths. Studies show that the lower number of chest compressions leads to less blood circulation because it takes several compressions to build enough pressure to begin blood circulation after a rescue breath.

(Source http://www.ltvnews.com/viewarticle.php?id=4052)

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Reducing Growing the Deficit – GOP Style

by casey on Nov.18, 2005, under Political Maundering

Last time I checked 50 billion in spending cuts and 60 billion in tax cuts adds 10 billion to the deficit. How exactly is this a winning budget plan as so proclaimed by the Republicans?

After weeks of lobbying and intra-party squabbling, the House of Representatives narrowly approved a five-year, $50bn package of cuts to federal benefits programs, while the Senate backed a $60bn package of tax cuts.

It is a shame the 50 billion in cuts are to programs like Medicaid, food stamps, student loan subsidies, state child-support enforcement programs, and farm support. It is estimated that the House bill would cut $220,000 people off food stamps. I wonder how many of those people live in New Orleans? How quickly we forget the President’s pledge to rebuild New Orleans and put an end to the poverty in that region. Has the OMB even taken into account the President’s Katrina speech? Maybe they are still working on last year’s numbers? Where is the “unprecedented response of an extra 60 billion dollars” asked for by the President going to come from? — (let me guess the poor in New Orleans will have to give up more programs.) Was that all empty rhetoric of a President trying to save face?
My favorite part of this whole House budget proposal is a “concession” to the moderates.

A provision denying Medicaid nursing home benefits to people with home equity of $500,000 or more was modified by raising the equity standard to $750,000 or more.

Are you kidding me. If you have $500,000 in home equity you don’t need Medicaid because you probably are already a doctor with a great health care plan. Seriously… Raised from $500,000 to $750,000 … WTF… How can we give 60 billion in tax cuts to the wealthiest Americans and nonchalantly cut food stamps for 220,000 of the poorest Americans? You do know what I mean by “tax cuts to the wealthiest,” right? If not… that means lowering the dividend and long term capital gains tax rate from an already amazingly low 20% to 15%. When was the last time YOU paid 15% in income taxes? Could you imagine if they only took 15% out of your paycheck instead of more than 30%. Isn’t it backwards that the people that actually need the money to live are the people that don’t get it? Like I recently read… “Don’t Balance the Budget on the Backs of the Poor.” This “Reverse Robinhood” has to stop.

(Source MSNBC.com)
(Source WashingtonPost.com subscription required)

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Marijuana Leagalized in Denver

by casey on Nov.08, 2005, under Drunken Rambling, Political Maundering

Seriously… this is no kidding… From what I can gather this is the second large city, next to Oakland, to legalize marijuana. They always say that you must first admit you have a problem before you can fix it … Well, we have a problem and it is called “The War on Drugs“….

(Source www.denvergov.org)

(Source saferchoice.org)

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Drunk drivers granted access to breathalyser source code

by casey on Nov.04, 2005, under Drunken Rambling, Political Maundering, Software Digression

A panel of judges in the Florida county of Sarasota has granted a request by a group of over 150 citizens accused of drink-driving to view the source code of the breathalyser that was used to determine their breath alcohol levels.


If CMI keeps refusing to subject the application to an independent audit, it is unlikely that a judge can force it to do so. This would render the results of the test inadmissible in court.

(The Judge’s Ruling)
(Source http://www.vnunet.com)

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Suicide Terrorism Motives

by casey on Oct.31, 2005, under Political Maundering

Associate Professor Robert Pape of the University of Chicago has compiled an extensive database of all terrorist attacks from around the world since 1980. What he found is quite contrary to the current administration’s postulate that suicidal terrorism is driven by religious extremists.

The central fact is that overwhelmingly suicide-terrorist attacks are not driven by religion as much as they are by a clear strategic objective: to compel modern democracies to withdraw military forces from the territory that the terrorists view as their homeland. From Lebanon to Sri Lanka to Chechnya to Kashmir to the West Bank, every major suicide-terrorist campaign-over 95 percent of all the incidents-has had as its central objective to compel a democratic state to withdraw.

(Source The American Conservative)

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The next Alan Greenspan…

by casey on Oct.24, 2005, under Political Maundering

Ben S. Bernanke (Ph. D., MIT, 1979), is the Howard Harrison and Gabrielle Snyder Beck Professor of Economics and Public Affairs at Princeton University and the Chairman of the Department of Economics. He is a macroeconomist with interests in monetary policy and macroeconomic history. He is the Director of the Monetary Economics Program of the National Bureau of Economics Research and the Editor of the American Economic Review.

Current papers:

I scanned the “Monetary Policy in a Data-Rich Environment” paper and can report this guy sounds like a Fed Chairman that techno geeks can live with. In this paper he advocates using larger, more complex data sets to make federal economic decisions.
(Source Princeton.edu/~bernake)

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More thoughts about the tracking dots

by casey on Oct.22, 2005, under Drunken Rambling

I wonder if the government agency that brokered the deal with the printer manufacturers also tried to broker a deal with digital camera manufacturers. I could easily see digital cameras being programmed to produce a digital photograph with hidden tracking artifacts, both in the underlying digital file, as well as in the photo itself. It would be the color printer dots meet stenography marriage, a governmental watermark, if you will. What about embedding tracking artifacts in PDFs, Word docs, or Excel spreadsheets (other than what is already available)? What about tracking iTunes or other mp3 rippers to catch copyright infringement? The list of tracking possibilities is really endless.

It is funny because I have always thought about the use of stenography (or encryption in general) to hide things from the government and never for the government to hide things from me. So the question now is, how can we detect these artifacts and how can we sanitize our digital files?

What are the political ramifications? The corporations involved are multinational which could pose a threat to American intelligence agents who unwittingly passed a tracked document to a foreign agency in the know. I wonder how the world of espionage has changed since the introduction of these tracking dots? It seems that this “secret” would have been let out of the bag a long time ago had the general intelligence community known about it. So really how “secret” was it?

The last thing on my drunken mind is have the dots actually been used to track or capture a criminal? Is it mostly be used in counterfeiting cases? Could a FOIA request be made asking for information about use of the dots? Are they being used by intelligence officials in Iraq and Afghanistan? When we regularly hear about the piles of confiscated documents that go unread, I wonder if there is an automated device that is used to decode the tracking information quickly and flag “hot” documents? Have the dots been used in counter-intelligence? Has fake tracking dots been fabricated to throw a would be tracker off? Well if nothing comes of this, at least we have the start of a good spy novel.

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Electronic Freedom Foundation Discovers Secret Code in Color Printers

by casey on Oct.18, 2005, under Drunken Rambling

This is one of the reasons why I donate regularly to the EFF; they truly do amazing work.

San Francisco – A research team led by the Electronic Frontier Foundation (EFF) recently broke the code behind tiny tracking dots that some color laser printers secretly hide in every document.

The U.S. Secret Service admitted that the tracking information is part of a deal struck with selected color laser printer manufacturers, ostensibly to identify counterfeiters. However, the nature of the private information encoded in each document was not previously known.

Read the whole thing here – http://www.eff.org/news/archives/2005_10.php#004063

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Spam Stock Tracker.com

by casey on Oct.10, 2005, under Drunken Rambling

I recently stumbled on SpamStockTracker.com, a site dedicated to tracking the charts of the stocks from spam emails we all get. He found out over a two week period that the stocks lost on average 50%. Now if we can just figure out a way to short a penny stock we would all be millionaires.

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Bipin Che Helbling

by casey on Oct.09, 2005, under Random Thoughts

Bipin Che Helbling
Yesterday we added a member to the Helbling family, Bipin Che Helbling. He is an 8 week old, adorable Havanese. I think he will be the perfect pet since he is both playful and relaxed; a great combination of curiosity and tenderness. And to top it all off, last night he slept the whole night through without whining! My kind of dog. Here are a few movie clips for your enjoyment (photos to follow soon).

MPG – Bipin playing in the new house – (54 MB)
MPG – Bipin playing in the backyard – (10 MB)
MPG – Bipin playing in the backyard again – (13 MB)
Photos

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Operation Crusade

by casey on Oct.07, 2005, under Political Maundering

A three-part documentary on peace in the Middle East airs next week in Britain. In it high-level Palestinian leaders quote Bush as taking his foreign policy direction from God. Nabil Shaath, Palestinian prime minister and now the Palestinian Authority president recalls what Bush said to him in a high-level meeting in June 2003,

I’m driven with a mission from God. God would tell me, ‘George, go and fight those terrorists in Afghanistan.’ And I did, and then God would tell me, ‘George, go and end the tyranny in Iraq …’ And I did. And now, again, I feel God’s words coming to me, ‘Go get the Palestinians their state and get the Israelis their security, and get peace in the Middle East.’ And by God I’m gonna do it.

The White House denies the quote. I wonder if the CIA is getting their intelligence from God too?
(Source San Francisco Chronical – “Bush said God told him to invade Iraq”)
(Source BBC – “White House denies Bush God claim”)

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Still Recovering

by casey on Oct.04, 2005, under Random Thoughts

The runs went rather well, Erin and I both finished… some people just call me the 2 second guy since my chip time was 3:59:58. Seriously, talk about cutting it close. My legs are still very sore and I grimace every time I stand up. Hopefully the lactic acid goes away soon. I have some video footage of the death trot that I would like to post in the upcoming days. It is pretty funny to see such a fatty running next to all the skinny little “professional” runners. I’m sure you will all get a kick out of it.

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If Found, Please Return to 1201 Yale Place.

by casey on Oct.01, 2005, under People are Idiots

Today I run the Twin Cities Marathon. I was thinking that I should write on my shirt, “If found, please return to 1201 Yale Place,” just in case things don’t go as well as I hope they will. Last year I ran Grandma’s Marathon in just under four hours and am trying to better that this year. Erin is running the 10 miler this year and is very nervous, so if you see her on the trail, shout some words of encouragement.

You can track me on the results page using bib #3398.

Wish us luck!!!

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Roberts + Hamdan + Bush = Conflict of Interest

by casey on Sep.22, 2005, under Political Maundering

Let’s say are a judge in a case. Four days before you decide the verdict the defendant secretly approaches you with an offer of a promotion to your dream job. Doesn’t this qualify as “impartiality might reasonably be questioned?”

Read on to find out that this is exactly what happened in the Hamdan case involving a suspected terrorist Hamdan and the President. The President questioned Judge Roberts about a Supreme Court nomination four days before the verdict was decided. Under normal circumstances an ethical judge would recuse himself. In this case though, Robert’s did the opposite, he stayed on and sided in favor of the President. Impartiality reasonably questioned? … You be the judge.

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